How come bike color affect its top speed ?

PH005 · 08-27-2008, 3:04 PM

" Beam Him Up Scotty "

fasterspider · 08-27-2008, 3:37 PM

There goes Strek again off on a wild tangent about his deluded thinking that a color we do not speak is faster than a Red Bird but, we are going to run into this issue time and time again until you guys come here to Los Angeles and face me on my Red Bird.
Too bad I cannot find a picture of Howies Red Bird that is extremely modified with Japanese CBRXX race team goodies. His bike was my major influence in buying my Red Bird.

wigo · 08-27-2008, 4:00 PM

PH005 is your red a custom paint job? Looks like it with aftermarket plastic... what was the original color? It was not black was it?

Logoman · 08-27-2008, 9:24 PM

I got the left side fairing for my silver '02 today.

The UPS driver looked badly shaken. He told me that my package was so fast that he had to put his truck in neutral and ride the brake just to keep from rear-ending everyone on the road.

Poor guy. He was trained delivering the black and red XX parts so he wasn't at all prepared for the insane speeds even a package containing a silver XX part were capable of.

SilverBrd · 08-27-2008, 9:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Logoman

I got the left side fairing for my silver '02 today.

The UPS driver looked badly shaken. He told me that my package was so fast that he had to put his truck in neutral and ride the brake just to keep from rear-ending everyone on the road.

Poor guy. He was trained delivering the black and red XX parts so he wasn't at all prepared for the insane speeds even a package containing a silver XX part were capable of.

Now that is badass!! Poor UPS dude

wigo · 08-27-2008, 10:44 PM

very creative...

Strek · 08-28-2008, 1:14 AM

The riders of the TRUE BLACKbird don't have to be bothered with transporters. We have warp drive. Being beamed up would only mean that you are going from one BLACKbird to another since the BLACK ones are the only ones capable of Warp drive. As far as a stupid box in a UPS truck if the package was TRUE BLACKbird parts it would have came all on its own. The external structure of a UPS truck is not sufficent to withstand the pressures of Warp drive. You guys that ride non black. How does it feel to ride a BLACKbird in name only?

SilverBrd · 08-28-2008, 2:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strek

The riders of the TRUE BLACKbird don't have to be bothered with transporters. We have warp drive. Being beamed up would only mean that you are going from one BLACKbird to another since the BLACK ones are the only ones capable of Warp drive. As far as a stupid box in a UPS truck if the package was TRUE BLACKbird parts it would have came all on its own. The external structure of a UPS truck is not sufficent to withstand the pressures of Warp drive. You guys that ride non black. How does it feel to ride a BLACKbird in name only?

Raising your ass up and farting does not mean you have warp drive Streck even though you think you are going faster doing it.

I think we will call it "FART DRIVE" from now on for you silly burnt brown riders out there.

Silver rocks and rules over all you slower color boys.... Sorry to give you the bad news man.

outlawgibbs · 08-28-2008, 2:34 AM

Sorry to break the news to you silverbrd but all the silverbirds are just black ones that faded in the Texas sun. So your bird is really black with a shitty paintjob

PH005 · 08-28-2008, 4:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wigo

PH005 is your red a custom paint job? Looks like it with aftermarket plastic... what was the original color? It was not black was it?

Ah Ha Fluro Bodysuit Boy. The truth is seeping out. You wish my beautiful Red steed was originally black for the simple reason that you thought you could run down to "Joe's Paint Shop" and have yours painted to match and look as awesomely fast. Well. You cant. Red Birds Are Born, not painted. And only the very few and select riders are given the honor of throwing ones leg over one. The rest of you just live in a sort of make believe world, kinda like Star Trek, ah Strek, I can see ya prouncing about with your fake ears on and your trackie pants tucked into your boots. Pathetic little souls you are.

Anyway Red is Fastest. Has anyone seen our Red Leader ?

Strek · 08-28-2008, 9:07 AM

The only portion of my world that is make believe is when I read posts from riders of BLACKbirds that aren't BLACK thinking that they are on a faster bike then the true BLACKbird. All BLACKbirds begin life BLACK. It is what they are called afterall. BLACKbirds. Go back and read about the chip and you will understand. They are then painted the slower colors for riders who can't handle reality. Red leader??? You need a leader. Red leader?? Isn't that from Star Wars right before the dude gets blown to bits. Maybe he should have been on a true BLACKbird and then no one would have caught up to him to blow him to bits. Riders of the true BLACKbird lead (thats because we are always in front and waiting for the riders of the slower colors.) and we don't require an individual leader. Fart drive was invented in Texas by riders of silverbirds. It was a first attempt to keep up with the Warp Drive equipped BLACKbird. Fart drive has its limitations as I'm sure Silverbrd has discovered. SilverBrd knows that even with his fart drive he will not keep up. His Fart Drive only works as long as he can keep the Farting up (which I hear is quite some time) but still eventually the Farts run out. You don't have friends cause no one wants to ride with someone that keeps farting to keep forward momentem going. The worst part about Fart Drive is that it is still not as fast as a BLACKbird. I know what you are going to say. There are a lot of beans to eat down in Texas and that is true. Texas might be the bean capital of the U.S. . You can keep your Fart Drive on line for quite some time. Well your fart drive just isn't as fast as you dream it is. I know that you will continue to work to perfect your fart drive in a failed attempt to keep up with the warp drive of the TRUE BLACKbird. Good luck and I hope your family can put up with the practice and test runs of your Fart Drive...

wigo · 08-28-2008, 3:11 PM

It is simple....

Black is fastest.

Period...

PH
I think I will make my license plate FLOR BSB...

That is great.

SilverBrd · 08-28-2008, 9:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strek

The only portion of my world that is make believe is when I read posts from riders of BLACKbirds that aren't BLACK thinking that they are on a faster bike then the true BLACKbird. All BLACKbirds begin life BLACK. It is what they are called afterall. BLACKbirds. Go back and read about the chip and you will understand. They are then painted the slower colors for riders who can't handle reality. Red leader??? You need a leader. Red leader?? Isn't that from Star Wars right before the dude gets blown to bits. Maybe he should have been on a true BLACKbird and then no one would have caught up to him to blow him to bits. Riders of the true BLACKbird lead (thats because we are always in front and waiting for the riders of the slower colors.) and we don't require an individual leader. Fart drive was invented in Texas by riders of silverbirds. It was a first attempt to keep up with the Warp Drive equipped BLACKbird. Fart drive has its limitations as I'm sure Silverbrd has discovered. SilverBrd knows that even with his fart drive he will not keep up. His Fart Drive only works as long as he can keep the Farting up (which I hear is quite some time) but still eventually the Farts run out. You don't have friends cause no one wants to ride with someone that keeps farting to keep forward momentem going. The worst part about Fart Drive is that it is still not as fast as a BLACKbird. I know what you are going to say. There are a lot of beans to eat down in Texas and that is true. Texas might be the bean capital of the U.S. . You can keep your Fart Drive on line for quite some time. Well your fart drive just isn't as fast as you dream it is. I know that you will continue to work to perfect your fart drive in a failed attempt to keep up with the warp drive of the TRUE BLACKbird. Good luck and I hope your family can put up with the practice and test runs of your Fart Drive...

I must say I think I hurt your feelings about "your" fart drive Streck

and yes we do eat a lot of beans down here and I do tend to be on the gassy side from time to time and do fart a lot on my Bird when I am riding cause no one else can hear it but you slow black riders will smell the ole air biscuit being behind me the whole time.

We Silver riders do not need any add ons to be the fastest color we just simply are the fastest.

If you want to call it "warp" drive, by all means do, but we all know what it really is.

Logoman · 08-28-2008, 10:00 PM

This afternoon I heard the sound of a truck and squealing brakes.

Sure enough, it was UPS again. This time it was a different driver looking even more shaken than the first.

The brakes were glowing like the sun and I could smell burnt wheel bearing grease.

"Where's the other guy?," I asked the driver. Overcome with emotion, his voice cracked. "He didn't come to work for a couple of days," he replied. "One of the guys found him in his apartment rocking back and forth weeping in the corner. He just kept repeating 'silver XX, silver XX' and refused any offer of food or water."

I looked at the package the driver had a death grip on and could see that his resolve was giving way.

"Right side fairing?," I asked. He nodded. "Sorry 'bout that," I said, and gave him a pat on the back. "I should've bought one of the slower colors."

As he walked away, just a shell of a man, I heard him mutter, "Damn you, silver XX, damn you!"

I have yet to receive my new windscreen and full Hindle exhaust system. I have a feeling the UPS Human Resources department is going to be very busy.

Strek · 08-29-2008, 2:17 AM

Silverbrd... Well it sounds like you might have downed enough of those beans to get your fart drive perfected and of the ground. Now you can gain some small measure of forward motion. Way to go... Finally moving. Excellent.
The riders of TRUE BLACKbirds would not be smelling anything. Its like that saying if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it does it still make a sound. Well with your fart drive if you let a series of farts go to get yourself underway would a TRUE BLACKbird be around to take in the after affect

fasterspider · 08-29-2008, 11:50 AM

You all are silly, red Birds are the best, red Birds are the nicest and red Birds are the fastest.

Strek · 08-29-2008, 12:08 PM

Fasterspider... Are you the red Leader that PH005 is looking for? I'm not sure which red BLACKbird rider he was referring to. Maybe it's Lois. Well good luck to all of you riders of other color BLACKbirds. When I get back home I'll be heading up I94 at warp. You won't be able to see me unless you paint your bikes BLACK.

PH005 · 08-29-2008, 3:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strek

Fasterspider... Are you the red Leader that PH005 is looking for? I'm not sure which red BLACKbird rider he was referring to. Maybe it's Lois. Well good luck to all of you riders of other color BLACKbirds. When I get back home I'll be heading up I94 at warp. You won't be able to see me unless you paint your bikes BLACK.

Yes it is Lois AKA Fearless Red Leader and Lover of Bears. He must be off somewhere at RedLight speed, ( which is faster than warp and fart speeds ).

ArmyStrong · 08-29-2008, 10:52 PM

More PROOF that RED is fastest. Scientific proof. This one's for you, Sir Nutter!

Prism and Light Speed

fasterspider · 08-30-2008, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strek

Fasterspider... Are you the red Leader that PH005 is looking for? I'm not sure which red BLACKbird rider he was referring to. Maybe it's Lois. Well good luck to all of you riders of other color BLACKbirds. When I get back home I'll be heading up I94 at warp. You won't be able to see me unless you paint your bikes BLACK.

No, I am not the fearless Red Leader, that is Lois but, I am a fearless Red Rider who rides a Red Bird with a flux capacitor which also gives me warp capabilities that I use on a regular basis.

Strek · 08-30-2008, 2:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PH005

Yes it is Lois AKA Fearless Red Leader and Lover of Bears. He must be off somewhere at RedLight speed, ( which is faster than warp and fart speeds ).

PH005... Redlights are normally used for something else. We Chicagoan's love our Bears as well. Redlight speed??? No light speed is as fast as warp speed. All colors of the light spectrum and the speed that they travel at are not as fast as warp speed. You'd have to ask Silverbrd about his fart speed. Rumor has it that Fart speed is barely off the ground. He's already eaten all of the beans in Texas and has only gotten up to 5 MPH while at the same time stinking up the place so bad that his family is thinking of moving out.

PH005 · 08-30-2008, 4:02 AM

Strek, Please read scientific evidence posted by Armystrong. Note, Red Light. Best you stay at home with your cardboard cut out replica of a bike that reminds you of your TV idol space travellers craft dangling by a wire with fire crackers for thrusters. Warp ? Doesnt that mean bent or twisted. Us Reddies preferre straight red blurred lines. ( see again Red Light speed ). As for Fart speed. Well the last case I heard of that the poor fellow, ( a Texan no less ), farted down his trouser legs and into his boots and developed a serious case of Foot Rot. You may have heard of him. Toeless Texan Ted .

Anyways. Red is the Fastest colour by a Spectrum.

PH005 · 08-30-2008, 4:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArmyStrong

More PROOF that RED is fastest. Scientific proof. This one's for you, Sir Nutter!

Prism and Light Speed

I Salute You Sir.

.